Dark Side of the Hooligans

Hello happy Hooligans and welcome to the Danger Daily News. I am your host Mark Danger. Well I am sorry for not posting anything last night, I was at work till close and got home a  little late. Then I had to open this morning. So I am back for now and ready to cause some craziness. So lets see what I have to get into.

I got a call from Casey and Euan last night. If what I said when I answered the phone…..
well just let me tell ya you have been warned.

Robin Williams and his wife of 19 years are getting a divorce. Then Robin will come back in drag and be the nanny and house keeper. Wait sorry. I was thinking of a bad Robin Williams movie.

How about the jokes of the day…………………………….

A couple lived near the ocean and used to walk the beach a lot. One summer they noticed a girl who was at the beach almost every day. She
wasn’t unusual, nor was the travel bag she carried, except for one thing; she would approach people who were sitting on the beach, glance around furtively, then speak to them.
Generally the people would respond negatively and she would wander off, but occasionally someone would nod and there would be a quick exchange of money and something she carried in her bag. The couple assumed that she was selling drugs and debated calling the cops, but since they didn’t know for sure, they just continued to watch her.
After a couple of weeks the wife said, “Honey, have you ever noticed that she only goes up to people with boom boxes and other electronic
devices?”
He hadn’t - and said so. Then she said, “Tomorrow I want you to get a
towel and our big Radio and go lie out on the beach. Then we can find
out what she’s really doing.”
Well, the plan went off without a hitch and the wife was almost hopping up &down with anticipation when she saw the girl talk to her husband and then leave. The man then walked up the beach and met his wife at the road.
Well, Is she selling drugs?” she asked excitedly. No, she’s not,” he said, enjoying this probably more than he should have.
Well, what is it then? What does she do?” his wife fairly shrieked.
The man grinned and said, “She’s a battery salesperson.”
“Batteries?” cried the wife.
“Yes …..” he replied -

OOOH - Now this is going to kill you

OOOOH - You’re gonna hate me for this -
but it will make your day!!!
she sells C cells by the sea shore!”

or this one

Sip the Vodka
A new priest at his first mass was so nervous he could hardly speak.
After mass he asked the monsignor how he had done.
The monsignor replied, ” When I am worried about getting nervous On the pulpit, I put a glass of vodka next to the water glass. If I start to get nervous, I take a sip.”
So next Sunday he took the monsignor’s advice.
At the beginning of the sermon, he got nervous and took a drink.
He proceeded to talk up a storm.
Upon his return to his office after the mass, he found the following note on the door:

1) Sip the vodka, don’t gulp.
2) There are 10 commandments, not 12.
3) There are 12 disciples, not 10.
4) Jesus was consecrated, not constipated.
5) Jacob wagered his donkey, he did not bet his ass.
6) We do not refer to Jesus Christ as the late J.C.
7) The Father, Son, and Holy Ghost are not referred to as Daddy, Junior and the spook. David slew Goliath, he did not kick the sh*to out of him.
9) When David was hit by a rock and was knocked off his donkey, don’t say he was stoned off his ass.
10)We do not refer to the cross as the “Big T.”
11)When Jesus broke the bread at the last supper he said, “take this and eat it for it is my body.” He did not say ” Eat me”
12)The Virgin Mary is not called ” Mary with the Cherry,.
13)The recommended grace before a meal is not: Rub-A-Dub-Dub thanks for the grub, Yeah God.
14)Next Sunday there will be a taffy pulling contest at St. Peter’s not a peter pulling contest at St. Taffy’s.

Georgia legend Gordon Solie will be inducted into the WWE Hall of Fame. He is a true hall of fame legend to be in it. I remember as a small child watching Georgia Championship Wrestling with my dad and listen to Mr.Solie call the match. There will never be another person who can do what he did ever. Mr.Solie is the greatest all time.

How about the video of the day…………………….

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VEWjrxm2UrA

or this one

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M2SFBLOI2aQ&feature=related

The space shuttle Endeavour will be making a rare nightime landing tonight.

Well thats it for me. So till tomorrow stay HARDCORE.